When Avoiding Pain Gets You Killed By a Comet

Suggested Reading: Numbers 14:11-23

At the end of the movie, Deep Impact, as a massive comet is on a collision course for Earth, one family is stuck in traffic, trying to flee a city where the comet's impact will be felt most deeply. The family had hoped to find refuge in an underground bunker by allowing their teenage daughter to marry her boyfriend who already had a spot in the fallout shelter, but that plan didn't work.  Finally, the teenage husband is able to return for his new wife and finds the family by weaving in and out of traffic on a dirt-bike.  The girl's parents immediately put their teenager and her infant sister on the bike and tell her to leave. She refuses to go. She doesn't want to leave her family behind. They love her, but in order to save her, they insist that she leave, knowing she will be hurt by the loss of her family but hoping she will survive the coming disaster. They intentionally cause her pain, not because they hate her, but because they love her.

Too many people have fallen under the assumption that loving somebody means you never do anything that will cause that person pain. These people would be wrong. Numbers 14:18 tells us, The Lord is slow to anger and rich in faithful love, forgiving wrongdoing and rebellion. But He will not leave the guilty unpunished, bringing the consequences of the fathers’ wrongdoing on the children to the third and fourth generation (HCSB). Upon first looking at this verse, one can see a possible contradiction within it: God is forgiving but doesn't leave the guilty unpunished? Doesn't forgiving mean that you don't punish someone? Absolutely not.

As a father, there are times my children do things that are wrong, things for which I can forgive them. But as a father, I also love them enough that I want to teach them not to make the same mistakes again. So, even though I have forgiven them for what they have done wrong, I still discipline them, not because I am angry with them or because I hate them but specifically because I love them and I want them to learn. Forgiveness doesn't mean consequences shouldn't occur and love doesn't mean that you avoid causing pain at all costs. Some lessons can only be learned through pain and sometimes love means allowing people to face painful consequences so that they will learn. Sometimes the only way to save someone involves allowing something painful to occur. You don't like the pain, but you accept it because it will eventually bring about something good.

Some of us are going through some painful circumstances and wondering if God really loves us because of the pain we are experiencing. I would like to encourage you with a brief paraphrase of Romans 8:38-39: there is no amount of pain you can endure  that will separate you from the love of God. Pain is never pleasant, but it sometimes accompanies things that are necessary and good. If you are struggling with how to respond to someone, don't base your decisions on whether or not someone will be hurt but on what is best for them. Don't ever inflict unnecessary pain, but don't let the possibility of pain keep you from doing what needs to be done. 

Pain is a necessary part of life. Don't avoid it. Keep it in the proper perspective.

Removing Dragon Flesh With Burning Coals

Suggested Reading: Isaiah 6:1-8

In C.S. Lewis' The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, Eustace, one of the children who gets magically transported to Narnia, falls under an enchantment and becomes a dragon, unable to communicate properly with his shipmates and powerless to return to his human form. Eustace, who had started off as a pain in everyone's side with an antagonistic view of all of his shipmates, doesn't realize how bad he's been until he sees how well he is treated as a dragon, even though he is a burden to his companions. Finally, Aslan the Great Lion appears in order to remove Eustace's dragon curse.  He does so by ripping into the dragon flesh with his claws, peeling it away, and causing Eustace enormous pain. But Eustace welcomed the pain because it accompanied his healing. Almost instantly, the pain was forgotten in the joy that he had been restored to his rightful form.

The prophet Isaiah, I think, experienced a similar sensation when he saw the Lord seated on the throne of Heaven. Immediately, upon seeing the Lord, Isaiah said, "Woe is me for I am ruined because I am a man of unclean lips and live among a people of unclean lips, and because my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of Hosts." Then one of the seraphim flew to me, and in his hand was a glowing coal that he had taken from the altar with tongs. He touched my mouth with it and said: Now that this has touched your lips, your wickedness is removed and your sin is atoned for (Isaiah 6:5-7, HCSB). Isaiah's immediate reaction to seeing the Lord was one of pain; he became acutely aware of his sinfulness and knew it created a problem. More than that, the cure itself was painful: a burning coal pressed against his lips. But Isaiah never mentioned the pain this act undoubtedly caused him. The fact that his sin had been cleansed from him overrode the pain.

God's process for removing the sin from our lives is almost always painful. God removes our delusions and shatters the false images we have of ourselves. Often God pulls out the sin by allowing us to suffer its consequences and experience a great deal of pain. But when we allow God to do what is necessary, embracing the purifying fire and the pain that comes with it, God is able to peel away our sinful covering and restore us to our proper form. We can become the people God created us to be in the first place.

If you haven't yet, you will eventually experience the pain that comes when God begins purifying you and removing the sin in your life. Rather than running from the pain, when you recognize God exposing and dealing with your sin, embrace the pain, laying yourself open to God's cleansing work in your life. The process will be painful but, once completed, will be something you look back on with a profound sense of gratitude and joy.

A He-Man Like Depression

Suggested Reading: Job 6:1-13

When I was five, I experienced my first TV cliffhanger. He-Man had battled one of the weekly bad guys and knocked over a tower to do it. Unbeknownst to anyone, He-Man's nemesis, Skeletor, had disguised one of his evil minions (one who literally didn't have a heart) and placed him where He-Man would think the tower fell on him. When He-Man checked his heartbeat and discovered there wasn't one, he blamed himself for killing the man and fell into depression. He turned back into the ordinary Prince Adam and then chunked his magic sword into a bottomless pit so that he could never again become He-Man and abuse his power. Then the show cut to commercials. I was a devastated five year old. He-Man hadn't done anything wrong! How could he fall for the enemy's trick?! The hero can't get depressed and feel sorry for himself!

But He-Man isn't the only good man to ever get depressed. Job was also a very good man who had done nothing wrong and yet became very depressed. Job finally proclaimed in his depression, “Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant my desire. I wish he would crush me. I wish he would reach out his hand and kill me. At least I can take comfort in this: Despite the pain, I have not denied the words of the Holy One. But I don’t have the strength to endure. I have nothing to live for" (Job 6:8-11, NLT).  Job did not know that God was holding him up as an example of righteousness rather than being angry with Job. All Job knew was that his life had suddenly become very difficult and very painful very quickly and he wasn't sure how he could move on.

Far more commonly than we would ever care to admit, we will encounter people who are depressed, sometimes even ourselves. A depressed person has not necessarily done anything wrong, anymore than He-Man or Job did anything wrong. Sometimes, it just means that they are missing some key details. Sometimes it means life is painful beyond their control, that life is hard and there doesn't seem to be anything to be done about it.

The next time you encounter someone who is depressed, whether it is a friend, a family member, a co-worker or yourself, cut them some slack, pray for them, bear with them, listen to them, and be patient. Even the best people can face depression.